L: it is try-out day and i feel woefully underprepared for it
i am wearing my nicest shorts in the hopes that the comfort will bring me good luck
i am not too convinced they will succeed
but i will just have to find out for myself
i hope i find the fields in time to warm up
whatever that means—i haven't touched a disk in ages
who knows the stretches they do nowadays
the high-tech/falutin calisthenics one undertakes
to prove commitment to this sport of your full weight
but goddam is my gravity carried an uncomfortable way
in the awkwardest places
i am not as much in shape as in between a couple phases
of a couple kinds
of a couple shapes
and then the meanest subset of the variations taken
and splayed atop each other in 3D and imbued w/behavior
i am shaking somewhere
just a vaguely nervous ricochet along a longish vagus nerve beside my spine
running lengthwise near the region of my backside
but beyond that there's no details provided to my mental overrides
which one? there's twelve
i can't even distinguish—this is hell—between the feelings i am sent from inside myself
and so yet the rest of me trembles, in sympathetic little echoing vibrations
sinusoidal curves of goosebumps track down my arms in fractal patterns
here hair upraised; flowing wave of feeling toward my metacarpals
shut it down,
i am wishing there were someone just as new as me to
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